The biggest mistake we make when trying to create behaviour change

The biggest mistake we make when trying to create behaviour change

Perhaps you want to change how you leader, how you eat, sleep, parent, or how others prioritise their time, any behaviour change.

It is what we believe that drives our behaviour,

But we have two types of belief,

Intellectual beliefs and,
Actual beliefs.

Intellectual is what we THINK is best. How we think we should lead, how we think we should eat, parent, sleep, exercise, operate.

We might have heard some supporting science or read something recently.

We torment ourselves with the intellectual beliefs that we aren’t practising but despite that they are subject to change based on what information we happen to be taking in at the time and how much we trust or admire the source.

Then there’s actual beliefs.

This is the stuff we actually do because we have lived experience of it working for us. This is the stuff our nervous system has actually experienced as creating connection, hierarchy or survival in the moment.

What we tend to do when we want to change a behaviour is focus on forcing ourselves to comply with our intellectual beliefs. But because the Nervous system hasn’t built up strong evidence around this behaviour it is often resistant, particularly if the new behaviour compromises a current one.

What we need to do instead is analyse our actually beliefs.

Find those that are working for us and challenge and question those that are not to see if they are supported by false beliefs.

Actual beliefs guide actual behaviour so that’s the only place you can make a long term transformation.

Are you still using intellectual beliefs to inform your attempts to change your behaviour?