You wouldn't go to a fat personal trainer, why go to a coach not living their dream life?
There is a strange thing that happens when you take some time in solitude.
I don’t mean like jail or meditation retreats, although I’m sure they’d work.
I mean something like a regularly walking alone or meditation or even running perhaps - simple stuff but alone.
When the noise of everyday life is quieted, new ideas start to come.
New possibilities or directions you might like to take your life in rather than simply how to solve your current problems.
You become more aware of the stuff you are doing that you love but also the stuff that you are doing that’s out of alignment with how you wish to live.
That was the point I reached in Bristol.
Don’t get me wrong, it was absolutely my dream and I lived it and loved it.
But passions and purpose always evolve.
Once you’ve done what you set out to it no longer holds your attention and stops being as fulfilling.
Suddenly cleaning the toilet isn’t part of a bigger purpose, it’s just cleaning the toilet.
The re-occurring thought at the time was that I was just scratching the surface of what was possible and what I wanted.
I was fit, I had a healthy diet and I slept well. I earned a good living, I picked my kids up most days. I had a lot of happy clients.
But I wanted to do more, I wanted to go deeper and live an adventure and to do that I knew I had to go deeper with myself.
I had all the qualifications to start then and there but the primary qualification for coaching or performance consulting or what ever you want to call it, is embodiment.
Just like a personal trainer needs to be fit and healthy a coach needs to be able to transform their own reality.,
I needed to do something extraordinary. I needed to create my dream life and be in the process of creating my dream self.
If there were behaviours like alcohol or excess caffeine, or excessive phone use or staying up late for no reason or being distracted and distant or any experience of life I wasn’t 100% choosing. I needed to change it.
Systematically and without willpower.
If there was a constant low level of stress (and there was) I needed to remove it in-spite of the circumstances I believe caused it still being present.
During this time some life circumstances arose that would require some difficult choices and would be very challenging for the whole family.
The only thing that would make this period just a little easier was out of the question.
Sell our house, close our business and move to Copenhagen and start again from scratch.
... surely that’s not possible?
Ha ha... it still makes me laugh to think about now.
Starting again in a new country with no income, no plan, and just enough money to set up a new life.
100 days from decision to landing...
We arrived and slowly started constructing life completely counter to the way were are taught to.
We took a dream flat in a dream location. We committed to visit the summer house almost every weekend.
We booked 4 trips to France, 2 for skiing and 2 for sunning. We visited the beach and the forests daily.
I built a daily habit of self coaching, meditation, exercise, studying, reading, and writing. I wanted to feed every part of me. I wanted there to be no part of my experience of the world that I couldn’t rapidly change if I so choose.
I built, we built life in reverse so that when we began to start helping people to create the lives that they imagined for themselves we weren’t just selling the product, we were the product.
We are now a year into our business. Christina is launching a semi private yoga studio and loving the process.
I am loving every minute of my business, coaching business leaders, helping some amazing businesses and meeting so many amazing people.
I am currently working half the hours and making more money than in the UK without any staff.
This system, this set of tools I’ve have been using to upgrade myself is by far the most effective I have found for facing life head on and I’m really enjoying sharing them with others.
What I’ve learned is that the most important step is to acknowledge that we want a different experience of life.
That we are the cause of all of our experience and if we wish to change it we have to be willing to sit with it, not try and change our lives to avoid it.
If you have read this far and you would like to upgrade you’re experience. Perhaps you have some massive health, business, relationship goals or perhaps you are struggling with a constant underlying stress that is impacting every area of your life - your relationship, your kids, your health, your experience of work.
I know what that’s like. If you would like to upgrade how you experience life then send me an email firstname.lastname@example.org and we can meet for coffee.