10 Things My Most Successful Clients Are Doing That You’re Probably Not

Successful leaders seem to have more patience, more presence and more time. They never seem in a rush or to be OVERWHELMED by business and life. Ultimately the difference between the successful and the overwhelmed leaders is what they DO. In this ‘mini series’ I will highlight the 10 major differences between my SUCCESS clients and struggling leaders I speak to.


My most SUCCESSFUL clients are communicating with their colleagues, customers, kids and even partner using curiosity and extraction. As a result their relationships are improving, they are spending less time covering the same challenges and their teams are becoming more autonomous giving THEM more free time and more confidence in the people around them and more connection with the people in their lives.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from are using INSTRUCTION and EXPLAINING and as a result they have stagnating relationships, overwhelmed staff who seem incompetent and who can’t and don’t seem to be able to do anything without constant attention and guidance. The result is that they can NEVER switch off because they are the linchpin in everything and their removal would bring everything crashing down.

My most SUCCESSFUL clients ground themselves daily in their Defined, Refined and Aligned VALUES. The result is that they have EXACT, SPECIFIC and PRECISE clarity around exactly who they are being and what they would be doing if the BEST version of themselves is showing up. What that means is that they know very clearly if they are being RESPONSIVE- where they are carefully weighing up the situation and making a decision that supports the best interests of all involved and the direction of the company or REACTIVE where they are simply acting to end the situation with as little uncertainty, pain or discomfort as quickly as possible.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from just face each situation as it comes without any form of clarity in advance around WHO and HOW they make their best decisions. The result is that they live REACTIVELY without even knowing it. They constantly pivot as they chase the shiny new idea, they say YES to the best packaged argument and NO to poorly delivered ideas that might better support the companies mission. The result is a constantly stalling business, overwhelmed staff and a partner that doesn’t trust then so constantly argues to test their integrity.

My most SUCCESSFUL clients have a PROCESS of connecting with those beliefs in which they have unbreakable and unshakeable certainty and confidence. The result is that they approach every day and every challenge from a position of great confidence. Not in the egoic and pompous sense but operating from true and evidence based certainty. The result is that even during times of great external pressure they remain grounded, present and calm.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from find themselves in times of uncertainty, pressure or times when a lot of loops are open experiencing the dreaded impostor syndrome. As a result they find themselves snapping at people, staying up late, wanting to give up, being totally drained and exhausted and ultimately believing that they aren’t up to the task at hand.

My most SUCCESSFUL clients have a daily ritual that only takes 15 minutes per day but that primes them to be focused and energised throughout the day every day. The result is that they are not tired when they arrive home to the family and their body quite naturally moves towards having more mobility, strength, energy and firm stomach every single day without having to create any major interventions or put a huge amount of time and effort into it.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from rely on caffeine uppers in the morning and alcohol downers in the evening to balance energy and stress. They go in waves of exercise and forcibly trying to under eat until cravings take over. As a result they battle energy and focus problems after lunch, battle stiffness and back pain and suffer a gradually expanding stomach. They find themselves frustrated at the lack of energy they have for their kids too.

My MOST Successful clients are deeply connected with their purpose. What this means is the thing they were most ‘put here’ to do rather than the website, app, consultancy, thing they use as the vehicle they demonstrate it through. The result is a never wavering compass that they can call on when ever they feel lost or pulled off course or tempted by something shiny. They also have a daily opportunity to experience a sense of fulfilment as fulfilment can only really be experienced when you know what you’re here to fulfil.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from find themselves arbitrarily chasing what seems like a win right now. Winning the argument, saying yes to the short term financial gain or agreeing to something that sounds OK for now but isn’t REALLY what they want. The result is never really feeling like you’re doing something that matters, always plotting the future, looking out for temptation but never really enjoying the moment, always feeling a little lost.

My most SUCCESSFUL clients are alert too overwhelm in both themselves and other people AND have the ability to pinpoint EXACTLY what is causing the stress and know PRECISELY what to ask and why in order to REMOVE that overwhelm and get back to clarity and certainty again. The result is that their partners are blown away by the change in them and their relationship and their staff actually comment on how much fun it is to work with them.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from rarely recognise overwhelm in themselves until it has passed often leaving collateral damage of poor health, straining relationships and disconnect or disenfranchised teams at work. They also seldom recognise overwhelm in others mistaking cues for negativity, ignorance or incompetence and then add to it with information and instruction delivered in frustration. The result is unfulfilled staff keeping an eye out for a good exit position.

My most SUCCESSFUL clients have a regular practise for integrating their failures so that each one adds deeply to their knowledge and experience. The result is that they don’t carry their failures around like a sack of bricks weighing them down. Rather they carry them as strategic intuition that helps them navigate through personal and professional life with greater certainty and confidence.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from carry their failures like shameful and embarrassing secrets that hold them back from truly going ALL IN on the life they really want for themselves. They become a source of constant stress that prevents them from relaxing even when there is nothing that needs doing.

My MOST successful clients have a recipe that is their zone of genius. It is a way of approaching EVERYTHING in their lives from a position of both their greatest strengths and the most amount of fun. The result is that they enjoy what they are doing and the enjoyment creates habits which leads to more effortless progress.,Their joyful and relaxed approach lifts up those around them making them happier and more successful too.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from operate from the zone of SHOULD where they approach life the way others say they should. The result is that some things work and others they hate doing so they never become habits which results in them stopping and starting and never really creating momentum. They find themselves constantly on the lookout for answers outside of themselves and so never focusing on creating, testing and improving their own processes.

My MOST successful clients are consistently and repeatedly detached from their mobile phones and lap tops for prolonged periods of the day, without having to use force or willpower. The result is that they are MORE often mentally present and calm with their families and when they do work they are able to focus deeply on it and produce their best work.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from constantly have their phone in their hands and they feel like a slave to it as it constantly pulls them out of the moment and is an indicator to their families where their head is really at. The result is that their kids and partner fight harder for attention and they feel the stress of being always on and never feel like they are FULLY where they are.

My MOST successful clients have a simple process that supports them in maintaining their integrity. They consistently fulfil their promises AND they don’t make promises they can’t keep. The result is that they create huge amounts of trust in their family, friends, board, leadership team and teams. The result of this is a more harmonious life where all those around them also reciprocate by keep their promises to them.

MOST of the struggling leaders I hear from find that they are forever feeling guilty as they commit to things and then end up making their apologies or failing to follow through at all. The result is that they quickly feel like they are surround by people who don’t keep their word. The truth is that people ALWAYS mirror US back to us. The result is a feeling of isolation, like they are the ONLY person who cares and so they are always working and feel like they cannot ever stop.

We are all ultimately a product of our decision and action. My most successful clients have created these 10 processes that have led to them being MORE successful and meeting MORE of their success criteria as a result and in every area of life that matters to them.